Longing for It

They say that a father is a daughter's first love.Fathers takes good care of their daughters.There are fathers who will find silly ways just to be the reason of the laughter inside their home. Fathers are willing to sacrifice anything just for their family. Fathers provide their family's necessities. We always thought that many have fathers like them. But the sad truth is many don't. Worldwide we can hear news about daughters abused by their fathers. Such as being beaten or raped.

   In my case, I grew up beaten by my own father. I look at the picture of me as a baby. A man is carrying me. I smiled and thought somehow my father did treated me as her daughter. I remember when I was in my first grade, I lend my classmate a pencil. When I came home, my father asked where my extra pencil is. I said it was borrowed by my classmate but I completely forgot to ask my classmate to bring it back. He started nagging in front of me. " Why did you forgot? you stupid child!" he said ferociously. I didn't answered. Instead I cried hard. Suddenly I felt his hands grabbing my hair. He was like a lion hungry for food that time. I was like his opponent. As if anytime, I'd be slain. A loud bang was heard all over the house. I can hear my grandmother asking my father to stop but he didn't. He bumped my head on the wall. He still didn't got enough of beating me. He took off his belt. Afterwards, he wrapped it on his hands. I was hit all over again. That moment all I wanted was to escape the reality and come back when all is over. It happened over again. Sometimes, I would go to school with bruises on my arms and legs. Sometimes, he would kick me or even punch me. I admit, I grew up in fear. I grew up longing for my father's love.